The BFG (1989)

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2014-06-16

Twitter Plot Summary: Orphan Sophie spots the BFG dishing out dreams to children, where they attempt to stop the evil giants from eating children.

Five Point Summary:

1. His cloak doesn’t really make him invisible, does it?
2. Whizz-popping and catching dreams in Dream Country
3. Those giants are a bit evil.
4. The Queen!
5. Chinooks! Bosh! Bash! Surprisingly easy result, too.

Cosgrove Hall were one of the UK’s most prolific animation studios in the 1980s, mostly limiting themselves to TV animated classics such as Dangermouse and Count Duckula, but also dipped their toes into feature length with the likes of 1989’s The BFG. Adapted from Roald Dahl’s 1982 novel of the same name (and not from the Doom gun of the same name), it is a story of the one friendly giant in Giant Country who catches dreams and then blows them into children’s bedrooms whilst they sleep.

Both the BFG and his orphan friend Sophie are fun to be around, voiced with gusto by Cosgrove Hall regular David Jason and children’s TV voice actor Amanda Root. The BFG frequently muddles up his idioms and human phrases and is a source of great delight, as is the father/daughter relationship that develops between him and Sophie. The pair bond quite quickly, so it’s convenient that Sophie is an orphan and has no family to miss her.

The music score perfectly conjures up the fantasy and dramatic aspects of a world of giants, but it’s the song “Sometimes, Secretly” in Dream Country that really tugs at the heartstrings. It’s a genuinely touching song that follows shortly after the fun yet silly flatulence-based Whizzpopper song.

Bit of a size discrepancy even amongst the giants. And a touch of casual racism.

It’s also a story none more British – where else would you see a giant eating breakfast with the Queen in Buckingham Palace? Throw in some stiff upper lipped soldiers and the only way this could be more British is by turning it into a Monty Python sketch. There’s a fine line of British humour throughout as well – a discussion about what children from different country tastes like (Swedish children taste like Swede and Sour, Brazilian children taste like Brazil Nuts and so on) has the potential to be horrific but is in fact quite charming and amusing.

That’s not to say the story doesn’t have its moments of darkness. The other giants are truly terrifying creations, eating children and towering over even the BFG himself. Their deathly pallour and slobbering nature liable to cause the very sort of nightmare that the BFG is trying to prevent children from having. It has been toned down when compared to the book, but if that had been adapted directly it would not have been far too horrific. There are some concerns looking back at the evil giants, whose character designs are based seemingly on aboriginals. When considering that the oppressors of these giants are all white it does add a slightly racist air. There’s the possibility of reading too much into this however, so it’s not really a point worth dwelling upon. The giants are what they are, and arguably their design comes from multiple sources.

In many respects The BFG does look quite dated, but no more so than the majority of other animated features that came out of the 1980s. It also doesn’t compare quite as well to Dahl’s original novel, but it’s good enough to stand on its own as an entertaining kids film. Or for fans of Chinook helicopters.

Score: 3/5

Das Boot (1981)

By

Simon Prior

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2014-06-15

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They couldn't tell if it was One Direction or Justin Bieber that was polluting the airwaves. — They couldn’t tell if it was One Direction or Justin Bieber that was polluting the airwaves.

Twitter Plot Summary: The story of a German U-Boat during World War 2. The battles, the monotony, the man smell, the beards.

Five Point Summary:

1. Last night on dry land.
2. Not much going on…
3. ALAAAAAARRMMMM!!!!
4. Having a dig at the Nazi Command.
5. Gibraltar

Das Boot remains one of the all time great war films, perfectly depicting the life of a U-Boat crew primed for combat. The fresh faced youngsters soon morph into hardened (and bearded) veterans, all under the watchful eye of their seasoned captain, played by Jurgen Prochnow. Their journey is mostly spent sailing the Atlantic, waiting for contact with their enemy. The vast swathes of time they spend sitting around are punctuated by brief spurts of action and the threat of being hit by a well-placed depth charge.

Based on Lothar Gunter-Buchheim’s book, our introduction into the world of U-Boats is provided by reporter Lt Werner (Herbert Gronemeyer) who is on board to provide some first person journalism on the U-Boat war effort. Thanks to the decision to shoot the film in an exact replica of a U-Boat, the sense of claustrophobia and pressure is acutely felt, although the claustrophobia is automatically assumed and perhaps would have been too easy a subject to cover. Instead it’s about the men that inhabit U-96, their opinions on the war, their resilience in the face of powerful enemies, and their determination to do the best job they can despite perhaps not believing in the cause.

The shock and awe was palpable. They had just witnessed a man spontaneously explode.

Underneath it all is the tale of men who are weary about the war, who for the most part have had enough of their leaders back in Germany. Going completely against expectations, Das Boot is not a flag waving exercise, with only the first officer – a former Hitler Youth – acting as a representative of Hitler’s beliefs. It proves, as if you needed it pointing out, that not everybody in Germany was enamoured with the Nazis being in power, and patriotism shouldn’t be confused with supporting fascism. Some early scenes see fellow U-Boat captain Thomsen mouthing off about the higher ups in German command, and for a moment it looks like it could get awkward. Before anyone has to step in (Prochnow very subtly moves forward to intervene if needed) Thomsen realises his position and makes a joke of it. The whole film is full of little character moments like this that really add depth and our belief in these people. Germany may have been on the “other” side in World War 2, but these are not unlikeable people.

Das Boot’s final scene provides a powerful message that has been stamped throughout the narrative – that war is futile and pointless. Despite the many highs and lows experienced by the crew, it is this final punctuation mark that defines it, and ultimately makes Das Boot an essential experience for fans of the war genre. This Director’s Cut of Das Boot runs for 2.5 hours yet seems to disappear in a flash. For those who are interested in getting more out of this story you may want to check out the mini series which doubles the running time and adds more depth to the boredom of life on a U-Boat as noted by our resident correspondent.

Score: 5/5

Black Swan (2010)

By

Simon Prior

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2014-06-14

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Natalie Portman or Freddie Mercury? You decide.

Twitter Plot Summary: The slow descent into insanity of a young ballet dancer.

Five Point Summary:

1. Pressure from all sides.
2. A rival for her role.
3. Is this actually happening?
4. A fractured mind.
5. It all ends beautifully.

Black Swan started life as a sequence in The Wrestler, before director Darren Aronofsky quite rightly decided that the worlds of professional wrestling and ballet probably shouldn’t be mixed. For anybody who has seen The Wrestler, try imagining Mickey Rourke in his Randy “The Ram” Robinson in the Natalie Portman role and say that wouldn’t be a good idea for a movie.

Natalie Portman, who at times resembles an Innuendo-era Freddie Mercury (sorry, but you have to admit the resemblance is sometimes uncanny), simultaneously an adaptation and post-modern interpretation of Tchaikovsky’s Swan Lake ballet. Nina takes on the role of The Swan Queen in a production of Swan Lake, but soon things start to go a tad off-kilter and questions are raised as to Nina’s sanity – weird things start to happen and she sees her own face on atrangers, that sort of thing. Clearly not a healthy mind. Matters are not assisted by the arrival of Lily (Mina Kunis), representing the dark half of the Swan Queen that Nina struggles to reveal in her performances. Throw in a jealous, slightly older dancer approaching her retirement (Winona Ryder), an overbearing mother (Barbara Hershey) and a head of production who has more in mind for Nina than just an excellent performance on the stage (an always excellent Vincent Cassell) and you have a set up that is rife with potential intrigue and narrative-related puzzlement.

Aronofsky uses many of his directorial flourishes that featured in 2008’s The Wrestler, mostly by following behind a character as they walk from A to B, almost stalking the character like a voyeur. Much like The Wrestler, which Aronofsky cites as a companion piece to Black Swan, the direction occasionally has a documentary feel. Never a fan of a static shot, Aronofsky’s handheld camerawork creates a fluid, kinetic feel, and the ballet dancing we see is perfectly shot.

There was something wrong with her mirror, but she was too scared to check.

Whilst preparing for her lead performance, Nina also has to contend with an overbearing mother who is living vicariously through her daughter. Nina seeks perfection in her performances, but lacks passion. This leads to a recurring undercurrent of sexuality, in terms of both the good and the bad aspects it can unlock in a person – Nina also appears torn between whether or not she prefers men or women. At the same time Nina is about as childlike as it gets, her bedroom is full of stuffed toys, her passive tones ensuring she remains in her childlike state until she can “lose herself” in the role of the Black Swan.

This is a film that portrays the obsessive qualities that ballet dancers hold, showing that they are determined to get their performances right and willing to push themselves to the very limit in order to achieve this goal. It also covers quite succinctly the pressures and possible effects these might have on the mindsets of those involved, in this case Nina and, to a lesser extent, Winona Ryder’s fading star Beth. Whilst it would be going too far to say that all ballet dancers have these problems (which clearly they do not), it does at least highlight the perils of potentially exploiting vulnerable people to the point where their mental health deteriorates and they effectively snap. There’s a fragile line between creativity and insanity, and in certain circumstances, such as experienced by Nina, it won’t take much effort to cross over that line.

Score: 4/5

Kingdom of Heaven (2005)

By

Simon Prior

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2014-06-13

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They were all actually queuing up to see this newfangled Trebuchet.

Twitter Plot Summary: The tale of a simple blacksmith who finds himself leading the defence of Jerusalem.

Five Point Summary:

1. Liam Neeson imparts some good advice.
2. Julian Bashir from Star Trek DS9 shows up.
3. Jeremy Irons imparts some good advice. A pattern, I sense…
4. How’s he managed to worm his way up to that spot then?
5. Epic battle sequence.

Ridley Scott is quite fond of his historical epics, when he’s not jumping hundreds of years into the future and doing a similar thing with the science fiction genre. Or teaming up with Russell Crowe. Kingdom of Heaven takes place in the 12th century and tells the fictional story of the defence of Jerusalem from the army of Saladin.

Kingdom of Heaven deserves praise for its evenhanded depiction of the Muslim faith, but then that is as it should be. As a study of faith and differing attitudes towards those faiths, it’s an intriguing story. In fact it is the Christians within this story who are the most intolerant, and it’s refreshing for a movie of Western origin to cover this territory. There will no doubt be those who take umbrage at this approach, but it does at least point out that there is always more than one perspective to any conflict or set of beliefs. It’s probably lost on many people that the Christians were the invaders during the Crusades.

The attention to detail is staggering, which one has come to expect from Ridley Scott. This extends to the fight sequences, which gradually grow larger in scale until the final climactic battle for Jerusalem which takes place in the final half hour. It’s an epic fight that even without the first two acts of build up is worth watching the film for. Fans of blood, arrows, trebuchets, more blood and hot oil are well served, and the violence inherent in siege warfare is demonstrated in full detail.

"Whoooooores!" War cries just aren't the same these days. — “Whoooooores!”
War cries just aren’t the same these days.

Whilst the likes of Liam Neeson (underused) and Jeremy Irons (also underused) give their all, the weak link in the cast is Orlando Bloom as lead Balian, a mostly charisma-free zone where it seems showing any sign of emotion is a dirty concept. Balian travels to Jerusalem where he inexplicably becomes the city’s defender and guardian, gets involved with the wife of a snooty crusader, and finds himself supported by Jeremy Irons and his less puritanical band of crusaders. It’s your classic story of the lowly working class-type (Balian is a blacksmith) working his way up to the top. In this case it takes place simply because of a few good words based on Liam Neeson’s past exploits.

Where it suffers is in its pacing and structure, in this case because the studio insisted on 45 minutes of cuts. Suffice to say that the 3 hour Director’s Cut is probably the best choice to go for if you plan on watching Kingdom of Heaven. If you’re lumbered with the theatrical cut, bear in mind that some sizeable chunks of narrative have been excised, so if a story strand or plot device doesn’t make much sense, that’s the reason why. Even with this in mind, the theatrical cut has plenty going for it and fits in nicely with Scott’s other epics, both visually and thematically. It’s a shame that it was never released in its full glory, but then that’s why we have Director’s Cut DVDs.

Score: 3.5/5

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-oO6pCRe3pM

Edge of Tomorrow (2014)

By

Simon Prior

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2014-06-12

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Real action heroes don't wear helmets. — Real action heroes don’t wear helmets.

Twitter Plot Summary: Humanity is on the brink of extinction thanks to alien invaders. Tom Cruise finds he’s the one to stop them.

Five Point Summary:

1. Cowardly Tom Cruise.
2. Resurrected Tom Cruise.
3. Emily Blunt.
4. Weary Tom Cruise.
5. Full circle Tom Cruise.

It might be a total coincidence that Edge of Tomorrow received its UK cinema release around the same time as the 70th anniversary of the D-Day landings in Normandy, France, but the parallels are apparent to anybody with half a brain. The only difference compared to the history books is that here an asteroid crashes in Germany and unleashes an alien invasion that soon dominates all of mainland Europe. From their staging grounds in the UK, a task force of soldiers, assisted by some funky mechanical power suits, storm the beaches in an attempt at taking down the evil menace once and for all. Sound familiar?

Tom Cruise is Cage, a Major in the US Army and responsible for media relations. Suffice to say he’s not a combat soldier (he signed up with the media unit to avoid going into combat), and subsequently reacts badly when a British general, played with smug levels of repressed glee by Brendan Gleeson, ropes him into being on the beaches for the initial landing. After dying quite quickly in the initial attack, but not before being doused in alien blood, Cage reawakens 24 hours previously and from this point on gets to relive the same day over and over again until he either bleeds out or manages to stop the invasion. The Groundhog Day format, as it has since become known, can work brilliantly when used as an exploration of a character’s life or personality. Doug Liman manages to balance this out in Edge of Tomorrow, with the repetition not becoming dull or laboured.

The cos-play was really starting to get out of hand.

His transformation from self-centred coward to what amounts to a military genius is played nicely, although he never truly loses his self-centred attitude, he just gets better at not dying. Those who are not fans of Tom Cruise will find much joy in seeing him blasted in the face and blown up time and time again.

There’s great fun to be had with Bill Paxton’s casting as an army drill sergeant, no doubt a call-back to his role in Aliens. His performance is spot on and deserves to be in more films, military themed or otherwise. Emily Blunt meanwhile makes her mark as Rita, “The Angel of Verdun” who resembles a female version of Cloud from Final Fantasy VII with her massive sword and military gear. Bearing in mind she’s rarely in action roles, she holds her own and really does look the part.

The final act does feel a little odd, as though it’s been tacked on from another film, and the ending is a little suspect with a touch of Brazil’s “Love Conquers All” ending to it, but this aside Edge of Tomorrow remains an effective science fiction story and proves that Doug Liman still has the ability to helm a film on par with The Bourne Identity. But however you look at it, and no matter how good the film ultimately turned out to be, “All You Need Is Kill” is still a better title.

Score: 4/5

22 Jump Street (2014)

By

Simon Prior

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2014-06-11

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Trying to do something different apparently doesn't work. — Trying to do something different apparently doesn’t work.

Twitter Plot Summary: Schmidt and Jenko reunite for a case that’s exactly the same as the original, except they’re in college and it’s all meta.

Five Point Summary:

1. Trying something different.
2. Back to the old routine.
3. Angry Captain Dickson.
4. Separate ways.
5. Spring break, y’all.

22 Jump Street plays up to the fact that sequels frequently cover the same ground and are usually inferior to the original. By knowingly acknowledging that this is a follow-up movie with a bigger budget (just check out the new 22 Jump Street base of operations) and the possibility of more on the way (23 Jump Street signs and associated character dialogue blatantly signpost it), it subverts most of the established problems that sequels face. Once you’ve made a joke of this, you have carte blanche to do whatever you like.

In this case it does actually mean replicating the plot of the original (another point heavily emphasised after they open the movie by doing something slightly different and failing in their task), but this time the pair are sent off to college rather than high school. Villain duties are provided by the ever reliable Peter Stormare, although there isn’t actually much to his villainy – his role is more along the lines of presenting a “bad guy” face for the good guys to battle against. His plan is secondary to the investigation as Schmidt and Jenko find themselves separated by their differing opinions on how to tackle the matter. Jenko finds his calling as an American Footballer and bonds with a student who reflects many of his own traits. Schmidt meanwhile finds himself involved with the arts and humanities group, meeting the lovely Maya and her old-hating roommate Mercedes.

It might be a little too long but the jokes are numerous and keep things moving. The interplay between Jonah Hill and Channing Tatum keeps the bromance flowing, and essentially sets it up as a rom-com in all but name. A scene in a psychologist’s office confirms this – as if you needed it pointing out. Channing Tatum is often described as being a bit on the simple side, your typical example of good looking guy without much in the brains department, but that’s too easy a stereotype to apply. Based solely on his performance here, he knows exactly what he’s doing and clearly has talent, be it comedic or otherwise. His particular highlight, without spoilers, involves the ping of a microwave. Jonah Hill meanwhile is clearly marking his territory (thankfully not like a cat) as a standout comedy performer in his own right after playing second fiddle in many an Apatow/Seth Rogen production.

Spring Break, now that's how you end a movie. Maybe. — Spring Break, now that’s how you end a movie. Maybe.

Ice Cube provides the best supporting performance, his Captain Dickson is a source of great amusement and has the ability to conjure a laugh with just a simple, venomous glance. Nick Offerman’s moustache also puts in a sterling performance, followed thereafter by Nick Offerman himself.

Even managing to wring a huge number of laughs out of the end credits, 22 Jump Street marks the funniest film of the year thus far, and furthermore sets out Phil Lord and Christopher Miller, erstwhile writers/directors of Cloudy With A Chance of Meatballs, The Lego Movie and the Jump Street series, as perhaps the hottest comedy talent in Hollywood at the moment.

Score: 4/5

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v9S_dYuq0vE

A Million Ways To Die In The West (2014)

By

Simon Prior

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2014-06-10

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Healthcare was primitive in them thar days.

Twitter Plot Summary: The many ways you can die in the Wild West, as interpreted by Seth MacFarlane. There’s a love story in there too.

Five Point Summary:

1. Sheep. Lots of sheep.
2. Toilet humour #1
3. Great Scott!
4. Toilet humour #365
5. Tarzan Boy!

After the huge success of Ted, hopes were high for the follow-up movie feature from Family Guy creator Seth MacFarlane. Family Guy may have lost its way a little in recent years, but Ted seemed to indicate that MacFarlane was more than capable of structuring a live action feature length comedy movie with regular co-writers Alec Sulkin and Wellesley Wild. Well hold your horses there slick, because A Million Ways To Die In The West likely won’t entertain you to the same level as MacFarlane’s previous work, which is a real shame.

With an over-reliance on generic toilet humour rather than crafting decent jokes, the genuine laughs are few and far between, and given that they’re spaced out so much, the running time could easily be trimmed by a good 20-25 minutes without damaging the plot. In fact many of the best jokes are call-backs to ones featured in Ted – Giovanni Ribisi dancing, a voiceless cameo being but two of them – which is a sad indication of the quality of this script when compared to Ted. There are a couple of amusing gags throughout, including a fun reference to Back To the Future Part 3, but things soon start to drag and by the 60 minute mark it becomes a tedious crawl towards the end credits. Narratively the structure has logic, but it lacks the escalation and the humour to carry it over the finishing line.

MacFarlane’s character – a man described as being born at the wrong point in history – is fine, but other than a reference to Parkinson’s Disease this is never expanded upon beyond his awareness that the frontier is a nasty place to live. On that note, whilst the film title may suggest there are a million ways to die, we only get to see probably fifty at most. It’s safe to say that interpreting the title literally would require much more than a hundred minutes to portray. His storyline of relationship woes mixed with the perils of the Wild West is a fun one, but lacks that killer punch or vicious snake bite to make it worthwhile.

They were strange times. Strange times... — They were strange times. Strange times…

Liam Neeson has what amounts to an extended cameo, showing up towards the beginning and the end of the story as a narrative device and nothing more. Still, he gets to use his Irish accent which suits the character rather well. On the other hand, naming him Clinch Leatherwood feels like it’s trying too hard to be almost but not quite that of Clint Eastwood. Charlize Theron has fun as the tough love interest, but despite her grizzled demeanour and fighting skills she ends up swooning over nice guy MacFarlane and simply drops into generic love interest territory.

The only song in the film, If You’ve Only Got A Moustache Song, is genuinely good, as is the accompanying choreographed dance routine. Some more song and dance routines along these lines wouldn’t have hurt in the slightest, and would have fit in nicely with the Western tone. Further praise must be thrown liberally towards Neil Patrick Harris, who is clearly having a ball as the moustachioed secondary villain Foy, laughing at his own jokes in a slightly condescending way and stealing every scene he’s in as a result. Sadly there’s not enough of him to make this anything more than a sadly poor attempt at a comedy western, and given the public’s general apathy towards the western genre in recent years, it’s unlikely it will do well at the box office. Even more damning – Blazin’ Saddles this ain’t.

Score: 2/5

Maleficent (2014)

By

Simon Prior

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2014-06-09

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Looks the part, but lacks the script. She should eviscerate somebody for that.

Twitter Plot Summary: The big bad from Sleeping Beauty has her story retold, because apparently that film was wrong.

Five Point Summary:

1. Some dodgy accents and child acting.
2. She’s a woman spurned. Right…
3. Those fairy godmothers are irritating.
4. Sharlto Copley Presents: Staring Moodily Into The Middle Distance.
5. Love’s true kiss… ugh.

In the latest of Disney’s efforts to make a live action interpretation of one of their animated classics, Maleficent retcons the events of Sleeping Beauty to make the titular big bad a touch more sympathetic than her sinister “the child must die!” level of villainy as seen in the original film and fable. It gets off to a bad start as we meet a young Maleficent and the monstrous CGI creation that is the land in which she lives. She encounters a young boy, Stefan, and they form a bond, blah blah blah. This in itself is bad enough, but when combined with the terribly cringeworthy acting of the two youngsters, it becomes almost unbearable. Thankfully this sequence doesn’t outstay its welcome and time soon pushes on to an older Maleficent in the much more capable hands of Angelina Jolie. At this point we also meet the older Stefan, now morphed into the equally as competent form of Sharlto Copley.

There are a number of changes to the original tale, but these don’t jar quite as much as the revisionist approach taken to Maleficent and her attitude towards the princess. Here she’s portrayed as being a fairy godmother of the young princess rather than the all-conquering evil force she deserves to be, having previously inflicted the princess with a curse so powerful that even Maleficent cannot break it. Suffice to say, the princess will prick her finger on the needle of a spinning wheel before the sun sets on her 16th birthday, and as the years pass and they spend time together, Maleficent soon realises the error of her ways.

The three fairies, who look after the princess as she grows from a baby to athe age of 16, provide a small level of comic relief, but whilst they’re moderately bearable in their full-sized human form, they are borderline irritating in their original, six inch tall and entirely CGI form. Sharlto Copley makes the most of his role as King Stefan despite an occasionally wobbly Scots accent. Unfortunately his character also lacks any redeeming qualities – both in terms of relatability or sympathy from the audience, and in terms of serving any sort of purpose to the story itself. His character does little beyond stare menacingly into the middle distance and there is little more depth or indication of motivations to him beyond his obsession over Maleficent. This is not given nearly enough screen time and deserved to be expanded upon.

If there’s anything positive to be said, it’s that Angelina Jolie is perfectly cast as Maleficent but doesn’t have a script that makes the most of the character. It would have been far better to keep Maleficent a much more sinister creation, deliciously evil rather than mundane and spending 16 years babysitting. Sam Riley is perhaps the only one who comes out from the other side of this unscathed, his crow servant Diaval displaying pathos and comedic moments with aplomb.

Oh, and the final set of armour worn by Copley is most impressive, giving the finale a feel of a live action interpretation of the Dark Souls video games. In fact, if more of the film had followed this pattern there would be much less to complain about. Instead it is a poor relation to the original, and you’re perhaps better served by sticking with that version of the story, if not for the glorious animation but for the fact the story makes much more sense.

Score: 2/5

The Cruel Sea (1953)

By

Simon Prior

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2014-06-08

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Not the best of places to take one's morning cup of Earl Grey. — Not the best of places to take one’s morning cup of Earl Grey.

Twitter Plot Summary: The adventures of a World War 2 convoy ship, with particular focus on Captain Ericson and the concerns of command.

Five Point Summary:

1. Snorkers!
2. A weighty decision.
3. Relationship woes.
4. Abandon ship!
5. Stiff upper lips, what what.

Coming less than a decade after the end of the war, The Cruel Sea accurately represents the harsh realities of naval warfare as seen by a number of the crew, albeit mostly the perspective of officers rather than those lower down the chain of command. Much of the emphasis is placed on a frankly terrific Jack Hawkins as the captain, with some strong supporting turns from the likes of Stanley Baxter, Donald Sinden and Denholm Elliott.

It could easily be seen as a companion piece to Wolfgang Petersen’s Das Boot, which considered the Atlantic conflict from the other side’s perspective. Surprisingly (or not) there is little difference between the two crews. It’s not a flag waving exercise, but is instead a heady mixture of stiff upper lipped Britishness and military discipline. As time progresses and the war drags on, the sense of weariness and despondency starts to kick in. The true perils of sea warfare are explored in great detail, although not in any graphic sense – this was 1953 after all. The tension is palpable during any scene of conflict, none more so than when Hawkins’ Captain Ericson must make the decision to drop depth charges despite some of his crew being in the water and certain to meet their doom if he presses ahead. Whilst we see nothing graphic, the weight of this decision is reflected superbly solely through Hawkins’ immediate reaction and his ensuing mini-breakdown following his decision to destroy the U-Boat at the expense of his own stranded crew.

You’d be hard pressed to find many contemporary war films that explore similar territory, in particular the grittiness and weariness that the characters exhibit. No wonder given that thematically the story is all about being exposed to a war seemingly without end, fighting an enemy that can’t be defeated without massive losses occurring on both sides. The potential horrors of your ship being sunk in combat also rears its head, leaving two small boats adrift and awaiting rescue after a U-Boat attack. When the captain gains a new ship some time later, his every decision thereafter is a direct result of that fateful event – cautious and determined to not let history repeat itself.

The end of service party had gotten a little out of hand.

There’s even moments available for the crew to explore their personal relationships. Denholm Elliott has perhaps the most heartbreaking subplot which explores the futility of facing off against the Germans whilst unveiling the effect the war has had on his relationship with his wife.

There are moments of levity amongst the drama, which is much needed otherwise it threatens to become an all too grim portrayal of the war, which would undoubtedly cause the audience a few problems. Those odd moments such as laughing at the marine service’s description of sausages (“snorkers”) help alleviate the heavy sense of gloom that threatens to descend at a moment’s notice. War is hell, clearly, but the bond formed between the sailors is clearly demonstrated and indicative to audiences both then and now that fighting for what is right always worthwhile.

Score: 4/5

Ted (2012)

By

Simon Prior

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2014-06-07

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"Ted? We can never tell Lori about this." — “Ted? We can never tell Lori about this.”

Twitter Plot Summary: The story of Ted, a teddy bear that came to life in the 1980s and has since settled into a regular existence with best friend John.

Five Point Summary:

1. Ahh, the 80s.
2. Ted gets a job.
3. Gordon’s Alive!!!
4. Fracture.
5. Aww, bless.

Ted marked the first live action motion picture from Seth MacFarlane, creator of popular animated series Family Guy and American Dad. Not straying too far from that formula, Ted is the story of the titular character who is brought to life by the wish of young outsider John Bennett, later to grow up and be played by Mark Wahlberg. After finding initial celebrity in the 1980s, Ted’s fame has since dwindled and he is now best friends with John and just living his life as anybody else would, albeit one who is now foulmouthed and a fan of drugs.

MacFarlane’s decision to perform motion capture for the character of Ted whilst directing the live action was an inspired one, allowing for both the real actors and the mo-capped Ted to improv live on set, which is frequently not available in the majority of animated features. This freedom creates a much more flexible approach to the dialogue and gives the character more life than if he had been animated and voiced separately to the live action material.

There will be a certain portion of the audience who won’t get some of the jokes due to the heavy number of references to the 1980 cult classic Flash Gordon. From clips of the film, to borrowing musical cues from Queen’s soundtrack, to a couple of appearances from Sam J Jones – Flash Gordon himself – the references are rife and entirely in line with the Family Guy style humour of “cut to” gags and toilet humour. On the subject of Family Guy and American Dad, look out or listen out for a number of cameos – there are many.

Just two normal, everyday guys. Except one is a teddy bear.

The obligatory villain is provided by Giovanni Ribisi and his overweight son. Ribisi’s Donny has coveted Ted since the 1980s and now wants his son to have what he didn’t. There’s further bad guy behaviour from Joel McHale’s smarmy and incredibly creepy boss who has his targets set squarely on Mila Kunis’ Lori. In what amounts to some good scripting, the narrative has the traditional three act structure but manages to have some fun with it in the process.

It’s also refreshing to see the girlfriend character not being presented as a screaming witch, the woman who wants the man to drop everything that makes him who he is in order to be with her. Her reasons for wanting John to move on from Ted are motivated by her emotional bond to him and wanting him to make something of himself. It’s a believable relationship between the two of them, and it’s equally believable that Ted can walk and talk. Ted’s relationship with Tami-Lynn and his employment at a local supermarket are certainly highlights outside of the Flash Gordon material.

At its heart though it’s a film with a heart at its core, the notion of growing up and leaving your childhood behind and growing up. At the same time it’s also about embracing the best qualities of childhood and applying them to your adult life. Ted certainly won’t appeal to anybody who has an issue with either Family Guy or the slightly more offensive side of the comedy spectrum, however for fans of MacFarlane’s style of comedy – or even Flash Gordon – there is plenty to recommend.

Score: 4/5

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